God graciously allows for sin-free divorces in cases of adultery or abandonment by an unsaved spouse. He does not command or require divorce, but lovingly permits it when all attempts at reconciliation fail. Aside from those two instances, couples sin if they divorce for any other reason(s).*
When a spouse commits adultery, God desires for the adulterer or adulteress to genuinely repent and demonstrate their repentance consistently through their actions. He also desires for their spouse to (ultimately) forgive them so that Jesus can heal and restore their marriage covenant. However, if the adulterer or adulteress lacks genuine repentance, or the damage is too severe for the violated spouse to overcome, God graciously allows for a divorce, but only as a last resort, not an immediate or automatic response.
Matthew 5:31-32 says, “Furthermore it has been said, ‘Whoever divorces his wife, let him give her a certificate of divorce.’ But I say to you that whoever divorces his wife for any reason except sexual immorality causes her to commit adultery; and whoever marries a woman who is divorced commits adultery.”
Matthew 19:8-9 says, “He said to them, ‘Moses, because of the hardness of your hearts, permitted you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so. And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery; and whoever marries her who is divorced commits adultery.’ ”
When an unbeliever abandons their believing spouse, and all attempts at reconciliation have been unsuccessful, God allows the believer to divorce. Their legal divorce releases them from their marriage covenant and renders them free to marry, but only to a fellow believer. Scripture does not include abandonment by a saved spouse as grounds for divorce because God expects them to honor their marriage vow and work through their marital problems, difficulties, and challenges rather than depart the relationship and divorce.
1 Corinthians 7:12-15 says, “But to the rest I, not the Lord, say: If any brother has a wife who does not believe, and she is willing to live with him, let him not divorce her. And a woman who has a husband who does not believe, if he is willing to live with her, let her not divorce him. For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband; otherwise your children would be unclean, but now they are holy. But if the unbeliever departs, let him depart; a brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases. But God has called us to peace.”
2 Corinthians 6:14-16 says, “Do not be bound together with unbelievers; for what partnership have righteousness and lawlessness, or what fellowship has light with darkness? Or what harmony has Christ with Belial, or what has a believer in common with an unbeliever? Or what agreement has the temple of God with idols? For we are the temple of the living God; just as God said, ‘I will dwell in them and walk among them; and I will be their God, and they shall be My people.’ ”
Apart from divorces that result from adultery and abandonment (by an unsaved spouse), legal divorces obtained for other reasons do not render couples unmarried because marriage is a lifelong, binding covenant that cannot be arbitrarily broken. Consequently, divorced individuals (who did not remarry but remain “single”) should reconcile or remain “unmarried.”
1 Corinthians 7:10-11 says, “Now to the married I command, yet not I but the Lord: A wife is not to depart from her husband. But even if she does depart, let her remain unmarried or be reconciled to her husband. And a husband is not to divorce his wife.”
Romans 7:2-3 says, “For the woman who has a husband is bound by the law to her husband as long as he lives. But if the husband dies, she is released from the law of her husband. So then if, while her husband lives, she marries another man, she will be called an adulteress; but if her husband dies, she is free from that law, so that she is no adulteress, though she has married another man.”
It should be noted that believers who divorced their spouses for unbiblical reasons and married another are not exempt from God’s grace and forgiveness, should they humble themselves and repent. However, God’s grace and forgiveness should never be viewed as permission to “sin now and repent later,” but as the means to free them from condemnation once they recognize their sin and confess it.
1 John 1:9 says, “If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.”
I hope this information on divorce has been helpful and informative.
(*Individuals who are being assaulted or abused by their spouse, or whose children are being abused or assaulted, should seek a safe place outside the home immediately. They should also report the abuse to law enforcement and contact the National Domestic Violence Hotline for additional assistance and direction.)
